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lindab
Thank you, this says so much of me and where I am at the moment, I am stuck in the mud and struggle to get out! My emotions are playing around from sad and extreme anger, all over the past I just cannot leave behind me, it is a constant struggle, this week was my worst in many months, my son was born 42 years ago, almost every birthday I’ve spend time with him, suddenly on Monday morning, the day of his birthday I realised I cannot remember his birth, It struck me with so much emotion and forced me to remember why, the night he was born, his father kicked me out of a moving car, I had to walk home, later that night he raped me, much later I ended up in hospital in labour, from there on I cannot remember a thing, it was only 6 days later that I could hold him, and I missed out on a wonderful experienced. I feel robbed, my son is not aware of this and he also was so sad on his birthday, maybe he also felt the loss that I am feeling.
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